Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Your exam question for the evening

you are called to review a 26 year old doctor in London. he is currently at a career crossroads of sorts partly due to the fact that the profession he is working in is dying a slow painful death under the weight of beaureaucracy, and, that life satisfaction is at an all time low because of the vast amount of time invested without reward in said profession. tonight he is attempting to review a series of topics for his postgraduate examination tomorrow. however fatigue is clearly setting in and you note his heavy eyelids of exhaustion as he thumbs through yet another book of practice questions. you note no rashes and he has no pets but has travelled to western canada earlier this year.

what will be the MOST appropriate way to manage this patient? (select best response from five)

A. sit down with the patient and explain to him that everyone has doubts about their direction in life at some point. this is most likely a transitory period and if in a few months he still feels this way then perhaps some time out to rejuvenate and reflect may be very beneficial. as for the exam, it is not the be all and end all and also can be sat again if necessary.

B. slap him about and kick him in the nads because he's an annoying fuck and deserves a good kicking.

C. nod sagely while he drones on with his "nah nah nah but what is the point if medical training is being sacrificed for meeting government targets nah nah nah" and see if there's anything worth nicking from his flat. hmm... 20 GB 4th gen ipod in corner... doesn't appear to work though...

D. pick up his immaculately compiled revision notes, rip them up then taking a dump on the shreds whilst saying "how do you like that bitch? how do you like that?"

E. intravenous antibiotics and urgent per rectum examination

5 minutes allocated. answers tomorrow.

[I am listening to Hope by R.E.M - formerly Leonard Cohen]


Kate said...

Oooh... you traveled to Western Canada... you're screwed, 'cuz that's where I'm from, and there are days when my life looks just as promising as yours :-s

And where's answer F - All of the above?

Seriously, though, I'm sure you'll do fine on the exam. Kick back, relax, and employ voodoo on whatshername... Hewitt? when you're done, eh?

MsD said...

aww u poor bubs!
Forget abt how work sux etc- just go to sleep early- u are not gonna do wonders revising late now- u'll be fine in the exam (i know coz u’ve been through how many years of studying Medicine? - plus working on your A levels so u get into Medicine?).
If you fail the exam- u can do it again. no biggy. life goes on. yeh?
I always find that i wanna bash up ppl who give me the type of advice i've just given u. "u'll be rite!" is the last thing u wanna hear in this situation huh?

so here i am crapping on again on somebody else's blog...

Wanna curry? what abt vindaloo?

Anonymous said...

Forget it.

Take some time out of medicine regardless of the result and you'll realise that there's more to life than chasing the next exam..... I've only met you a few times but you're a good guy and clearly need a break. Bum around the world for a bit, get some easy work in Oz and step off the big NHS train for a bit? You'll be back a different person- you may even be excited about medicine again?

The Venial Sinner said...

Work harder. Or you'll fail. And all the other doctors will laugh and point at you. And you'll never get to consultancy by the time you're 15. So there.

Thersites said...

Take it from me, someone who's passed both MRCOG & MRCGP, the answer is A.

vk said...

I would choose option F......stare blankly at aforementioned subject until both parties have drifted into a stuporous state and then proceed to thumb our respective noses at the entire medical establishment......have not been to your blog for a while, it is good to see you are as bitter as ever.